© the eyeranian

Today's Post

Somebody very recently asked me how do I think of things to write. Actually I do not pay much attention to it and just make mental notes of things that I find interesting during my day. Then whenever I get the chance (usually late in the evenings), I try to remember a few of them and pour my thoughts on my keyboard. Today was one of the days I had a particularly busy day mentally and as such figuered I had a lot to write about.

So, I sit in front of my computer and decided to check out the weblog before getting down to the business of writing. One of the first things I noticed was that Alireza has a new post on The Persian Version (see? this Ping business works!). I opened his blog and read with much sorrow he has lost his grandmother. I left a comment wishing him strength through tough times and also noticed he had stated that his uncle has written about her on iranian.com.

Later, I go to visit Jahanshah Javid's iranian.com and there I find him to be the uncle Alireza was talking about. I had no idea JJ was his uncle and that he had just lost his Mom. I don't know what happened but I suddenly lost all energy and enthusiasm I was reserving for writing tonight. Somehow it was all drained from my body, to the point that I don't even remember a single topic I was so eager to share.

I have always considered JJ to be a friend, even though we have never met in person. I started sending him links, news and some written thoughts long ago, when the Internet was still new and his was one of the first permanent stops for Iranians on it. I used pen names and rarely sent stuff under my own, until later when I got more in the public eye and used my own name on my stuff. One morning later on, he sent me an urgent email: "I need your phone number." A few minutes later he called: "I heard Googoosh has left Iran and is in Toronto. Can you find out if its true?" I did and a few days later was sitting in front of her as she prepared for her first concert in over two decades. Ever since then, we have tried unsuccessfully to meet on several occasions, but it has not happened yet.

So, why did his loss of his mother affect me so deeply? I'm not sure. Maybe it was the unfussy way he announced it on his piece "She used to complain that it took me forever to publish her work." Although further down the page he admits: "My mother has died. And there are a lot of thoughts on my mind. It's not going to be easy." Maybe it was my own fear of one day losing mine. I know we all face that situation one day, but I am certainly not prepared to even consider that option at this point. Whatever it was, it'll take me a while to understand and come to terms with it.

Meanwhile, if you wish, you can send JJ a message of sympathy. I am sure he appreciates it. His email is jj@iranian.com

Posted by Pedram at November 25, 2003 11:57 PM